February 2012
58 posts
Getting lasagne in a restaurant is like going to a brothel for a wank
– Phil
And press repeat…
eurgh annoying fat guy, don’t show me pictures of your family, I really don’t care.
So I’m casually sat in work and everytime the fat annoying guy talks I usually find myself going BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH.
Except this one time where I said it too loud, and he turns round and asks me why I’m going “BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH”.
Awkward.
Blah blah blah, insert generic complaints about it being Monday morning. I can’t even be bothered.
When you think everyone is ignoring you, then realise your phone is being a piece of shit and isnt receiving texts.
Got my first personal training session on Wednesday to go through my training plan, and all the exercises. So I’m looking at diet plans and other advice on how to maximize my workouts.
From what I can tell I pretty much need to double or triple my calorie intake. This shit’s expensive.
biteofnothing:
I cannot believe how loudly I burp
I was born to be straight
Eurgh. I’ve actually left the apartment wearing sweat pants.
I feel so ashamed.
I want a pair of Opera Glasses. Fancy ones.
I’d rock those bad boys.
2 tags
fat-moonkin replied to your post: Just booked a hair cut. £39! Better be the best…
hair cut of the gods
For that price it wants to be. But I’m too scared to let anyone else cut my hair
Just booked a hair cut. £39! Better be the best hair cut ever.
3 tags
I don’t know why I make to-do lists. I never do anything on them. I just feel like I’m achieving something in listing what I must do, even if I don’t do it.
Top of my list right now is to call and see how much a hair cut is at Trevor Sorbie, even though it’s easy as fuck I still wont get round to doing it. I have doughnuts to eat. Much more important.
There is a guy in the office keeps blowing his nose. Then when you think he’s done, he blows it some more. Then a bit more.
He’s almost beating the fat guy that sits next to me for most annoying person in the world.
mortalstrike replied to your post: mortalstrike replied to…
Me too! Why have I never seen you :(
I’ve not been in aaaaaages. This is why I need a personal trainer. Someone to shout at me when I don’t go.
mortalstrike replied to your post: ohnotom reblogged this from you and added: Yup….
What gym do you go to Maik?
Pure Spinningfields. In theory.
ohnotom reblogged this from you and added:
Yup. It’s here in my calendar.
That would explain it. Did you forward the details onto the over priced personal trainer I am waiting to get back to me as well?
Sometimes I feel like such an awful, horrable person.
Then I remember that I am.
And I go get a coffee and get on with my life.
The fuck is this, national don’t reply to Maik’s email’s day?
SCREW YOU WORLD.
My phone bill is £19.68. I’m shocked and/or appalled.
I was going to get up early and go to the gym. But then I forgot and did my hair.
So I wont go.
Gayest reason ever.
Ok, so i bit the bullet and emailed a personal trainer on a hotmail address.
Pretty much said I’m short, skinny and unhealthy and I want to be short, muscular and healthy.
3 tags
Some of these personal trainers have hotmail email addresses as contact details. The fuck man, you’re not a 14 year old girl.
I want you to make me into a muscular beast not a little girl IM’ing emoticons of flowers to her friends.
Facebooking the personal trainers from my gym to help me decide which one to go with.
Unfortunately the best qualified for my requirements also has a bit of a trannyface. Looks like he puts on a frock and goes to essential at the weekend.
But I could be wrong, totally judging a book by its (transsexual) cover.
The fat guy I sit next to in work has so far:
A. Mentioned his girlfriend 3 times
B. Finished off a bottle of full sugar coke.
C. Complained at me for not bringing in the flapjacks I made last night.
Only 8 hours 26 more minutes to go…
My job is so mind numbing. I just want to sleep.
If I see one more excel spreadsheet I think I’m going to scream.
Gonna make flapjacks when i get home from work.
Fucking love flapjacks.
Just got to work.
My head hurts. I can’t be arsed.
I just want to be in bed.
Went to bed early last night as I had a headache.
Woke up this morning and still have the headache.
fml.
1 tag
ohnotom replied to your post: ice cream is finished. could not be more bored.
Get Pizza! I hear that cures boredom.
I’m too lazy, order me a pizza Thomas?
ice cream is finished. could not be more bored.